Sylvester Stallone, with half his lip raised, muscles in his eyebrows, and a tricep pulley that he works out on while he’s driving, stars in, without a doubt, THE most important movie in the past 25 years, and possibly, in the history of cinema.

Of course, there have been other “sports” movies produced, Any Given Sunday and Rollerball ring a bell, but none have ever been as (wait for it) OVER THE TOP, as Over the Top, an arm wrestling movie where good ‘ol Sly arm wrestles because it’s what he was born to do. Somewhere in the story, he has a divorced wife who dies of cancer and a prepubescent son who very well might be a young Demi Moore, but anyone who’s seen the movie in its entirety can attest that the first 60 or so minutes of the film really aren’t worth watching. Instead, it’s only about the last 20 minutes, where Sly competes at the championship match, that REALLY matter.

For those who don’t know, arm wrestling has been a tribal form of settling disputes for years, possibly centuries. It has definitely been around since before Prohibition, that’s for sure. But I wonder what that’s supposed to mean.