credits: Sarah Tew

Woodman (human)

He is never scared. Ever.

We tried to get Woodman, fresh from competing in DNCHRD III, to zombify the beats at FSHN DL IV: UNDD BLL, but since he’s super busy at the moment, Woodman offered up this alternative: A Golem replacement.

Nearly identical to Woodman in function (slightly less in form) this animated clay beast will replace Woodman on the decks at FSHN DL IV.

“He wasn’t that tough to build,” said Woodman. “You can pretty much figure out how to do it from Wikipedia. I made him out of mud and then wrote Emet (Hebrew for Truth) on his forehead. If I need to turn him off I just erase the first letter so it says Met (Hebrew for death). What could go wrong?”

Golem Woodman doesn’t worry us that much (It can’t be too hard to take down a mudman) and Woodman assures us he possesses all the same DJ capabilities.

The real threat will be the zombie horde–their insatiable lust for brains. We hope dueling fashion designers–Eventide & The Lake & Stars–will pacify them.

Check out Woodman’s music blog, the21gunsalute.