credits: AX MEN

However epic you want it, that's how epic it will be

My mama used to tell me I was born 100 years too late...

We might have been at the forefront of this lumberjack craze with ARCH DL IV, but the History Channel is hot on our heels with AX MEN, an American original in HD.

The “American Original in HD” part is apparently an attempt to brand logging as part of Manifest Destiny, which it is, so…

The show follows a four companies of “tree fallers” as they deforest the Pacific Northwest, showing off the “paper cuts” that have left them with prosthetic arms, 9 toes and steel plates at various critical locations on their American bodies. There are also heart-wrenching lumberjack testimonials from men like Dwayne Dethlefs: “I lost my best friend to a logging accident…I hope to God he comes back.”

The lumberjacks also seem to be constantly swinging from cranes and leaping off the ends of logs down steep forest embankments.

Whatever. The music is epic. Angels singing and such. AX MEN premiere March 9th.